Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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What's worse than going in the wrong direkshun? ...My spelling

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what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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Why did the black man almost go to jail? He rolled a 6 in monopoly, if it was a 7, he would've been sent straight to jail without passing "go"

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whats worse then finding your mom with your boyfriend? finding your dad with your girlfriend.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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