pudding

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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Get out of the way everybody, a group of elephants are tumbling down the mountain!

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Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

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no rasist joks

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

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What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

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Why did the black homosexual blind man want to go to the comedy club? He enjoys a good laugh

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What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops