What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Small titties.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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how do 2 gay guys walk... one pounces into the others butt

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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When life gives you lemons make lemonade, when life gives you apples make apple juice, when life gives you cranberries make cranberrie juice and then when live gives you mangos, Eat them :)

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What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

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Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

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Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that moment, the Atheist cried out "Oh my God!...." Then the Atheist died a violent and terrible death.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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Why "Is Bart Simpson Yellow Its The Only Crayon The Illustrator had

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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