How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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An elephant walks into a bar..what the hell

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? - 2 Whats worse than 2 bee stings? - Holocaust Whats worse than the Holocaust? - 3 bee stings Now, if you are smart, you would notice that no one really alive today was in the Holocaust, therefore you can not make an accurate comparison between bee stings and the millions of Jews being killed. -SPG

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If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

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A six foot chicken, a horse, and a muskrat walk into a bar. They are then detained by animal control and the bar undergoes a thorough cleaning.

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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I don't get it

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a piece of toast.

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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What's the difference Justin Bieber and a Dic* the Dic*

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whats funnier then a children's hospital..... it catching on fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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