whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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The New York Giants

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Q: What did Delaware? A: A black dress. She was on her way to her father's funeral.

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A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

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What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

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How do you get a dog off of your roof? Shoot it.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Your moms so stupid that she called me to get my number

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What's worse than death? Not a lot!

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

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Bitch

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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Women.

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Please Rape William Wright

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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