Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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the fat boy named biggins ate a twinkie, a man named scruffy came along and shot biggins, now biggins has no nose

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one morning i turned on my tv

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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What do you call a black astronaut? An astronaut you racist

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Yo mama's so stupid.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................uh jk

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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