what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

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how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

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Daniel G. Likes to perve on the boys in the locker room. Change quick guys!

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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