Why didn't Suzie Fall off the Swings? She Has no legs and couldn't get on

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What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

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I went to visit my friend last week (not a guy, guys as friends? Thats just gay, I mean you fuck all of your friends right?) And she was really happy and stuff right? I mean REALLY happy, and the poor thing was depressed for like 8-9 months or something. So I was like: ARE YOU HIGH RIGHT NOW? >:( She said: YEAH I AM HIGH ON LIFE! I looked down at the ground, it contained a full box full of syringes and needles! So I grabbed the whole thing and threw them out! So then I learned what Insulin was anyways. Ps: Depressed, pregnant... Not sure anymore, it was like two weeks ago or something.

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Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Go in public and say this You-it smells like up sexy in here Person-what's up sexy? You-nothing much, how about yo

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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Whats worse than 12 babys stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 12 trees!

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Tits In The Third Grade? A. Because She Was 21

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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