What's the reason my dog died? I ate him.

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Two cows are in a field. One says to the other, "are you worried about this mad cow disease that's going around?" The other replies, "I'm not worried - I'm a squirrel."

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

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How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? Well, depending on your ideological views they are either both God's creations or two examples of species which have evolved over time. That is all.

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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Beauty is only skin deep Well of course it is, muscles, bones and tissues look disgusting.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Once upon a time there was a chicken...the chicken married a dog. They dog and the chicken had little baby dog-chickens then the daddy dog killed the mummy chicken by eating her. The baby doggie-chicks saw and tried to run away but the daddy dog ate them too. Moral of the story: Marry someone who can't eat you ;)

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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WHat is worse then Fred singing and cumy condom

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

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Q. Why did Mary fall down the steps? A. Because she had no legs.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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