A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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Women's Rights...

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Why did the man break all his bones? Because his parachute failed to open

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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why did the cow eat the seahorse/ because my shift keys are broken1

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to change a lightbulb? Why should his legal status matter at all in this situation?

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Why did the young boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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What do a fish and a moose have in common? They both live under water, apart from the moose.

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

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A man walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken I don't see anything funny about this at all. -Tag

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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