Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

What the difference between Adolf Hitler and Michael Phelps? Micheal Phelps can finish a race.

Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

why was the spoiled girl running from her parents? because they weren't her parents, they were kidnappers and were going to sell her into underground sex trafficking markets where she would probably spend the rest of her life being a slave.

A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" And nothing happened.

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

Why do so many people enjoy these jokes. They are funny

Why is Jesse so fat? A horse, Because a cow gives milk thus creating pee wee Herman to jack off at an astonishing speed

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

What do you a call a black man in a two piece suit? A respectable citizen, racial profiling is ignorant.

Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

What did the dwarf do after he sore a mole? Nothing. dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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