What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

Did you know? . You already know!

Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

A poor woodcutter accidentally dropped his axe into the nearby river when taking a particularly forceful swipe at the tree he was cutting. He felt so dejected he wept. Then, the goddess of the river appeared. "What ails thee, my dear man?" she asked. "My axe -- it fell in the river!" stuttered the weeping woodcutter. "Do not worryI am the goddess of this river, and will find your axe!" said the River Goddess and dived into the river. After waiting eagerly for several minutes, the woodcutter was resigned to the fact that he had imagined the River Goddess.

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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