An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap until there parents come home.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

thumb_up thumb_down -33

so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a black man on the moon? A problem What do you call 10 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A problem What do you call ALL the black men on the moon? A very serious problem. We should probably try and rescue them.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a blond british girl a blond britishngirl

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats9+10 19

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops