There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

A dwarf walks under a bar.

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

-What did the gay guy say in Mcdonald's? -Ill have a number 10, with hot sauce and a large coke.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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