Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mothers funeral.

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? He was in a spiraling depression due to recently being laid off at work, his troubled home life, and the recent death of his sister.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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Knock Knock. Go Away!

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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GONNA

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

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What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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pobody's nerfect

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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