why am I writing this...im bored

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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kkkk

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

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What is 17 meters, squared? A square.

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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