Your gay

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of african decent to sit in towards the front of a bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of european decent.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

thumb_up thumb_down -15

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

thumb_up thumb_down +7

An invisible man sleeping in your bed! Who ya gunna call? Most likely the local police department to report the strange incident possibly brought on by lack of sleep. NOT Bill Murray.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why wasn't the turkey hungry on thanksgiving? Because it was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

roses are red violets are black,why is your chest as flat as your back :O

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops