Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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British Dentistry

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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rarw

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Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

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relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

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What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

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What did one barstool say to the other? Nothing, inanimate objects cannot talk.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

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I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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