Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

Slavery

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

andrew wagner

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

knock knock who's there? Barbra Streisand Barbra Streisand who? Barbra? Streisand whoo oo oooo oo oo oo ooo ooo!

Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

what is worse then finding a worm in your apple find a worm in your ass

women's rights

i am writing this because i felt like it.

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

Whats better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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