how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

how black is a black man? pretty black.

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

dat shoe shine tho

How does a black man have sex? He inserts his penis into his partners vagina, then slides it out, then inserts it back in, and repeats this motion untill he has reached his climax and ejaculates!

Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!" Later that day, the man's daughter takes him to the doctor because he's acting strangely. The doctor gives him an MRI and the daughter is told that her father sustained severe brain damage from the injury. Now the daughter has to juggle taking care of her father, taking care of a child she bore from a drunken one-night stand, and recovering from her meth addiction at a rehab facility, all while making minimum wage at her dead end job. Eventually she hangs herself, leaving her father and child to slowly die on their own.

If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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