What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

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Knock Kock Who's there Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley is a fictional character in the novel To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Don't cry.

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1+1=2

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What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

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A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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What is the difference between Batman and a black man? Their skin color and bank accounts.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. No, the Holocaust never happened, you're an idiot.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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