Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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I forgot what i was gonna say

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Why did the lady have a birthmark on her leg? Because she came out of her mother's leg.

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Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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How Many Blind People Does It Take To Solve A Rubiks Cube? None Their Blind

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a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

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Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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