roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

No.

what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

What did the homeless children get for christmas? Hypothermia

Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

What is the best thing about dating a slut? You can return her at Build-a-Hoe Workshop.

women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

this is not a joke. jks

Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

Poop

Hearpin my durp

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

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Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.