Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because, It can't fly

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldn't tell any funny jokes? He went to Anti Joke and posted 1000's.

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Why did the police officer arrest Maxwell? Because he's black.

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Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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What hurts worse than a papercut? Divorce.

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Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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