Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

thumb_up thumb_down +49

whats the difference between a black person , spook and a porchmoney.... there is none there all stupid stinky n-ag-ger-s

thumb_up thumb_down +24

so a dyslexic man sold his soul to Santa

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

thumb_up thumb_down

What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who's gay? Justin Beaver

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats grosser then gross? A dead puppy in a barrel. Whats grosser the a dead puppy in a barrel? A dead puppy in two barrels. Created by : go josh or ty :D

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops