How do you survive a tornado? You dont.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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a man walks into a bar and has a drink james

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

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i had sex.

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What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

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What did Snichols do when he murdered his ex-partner who became a lesbian? The ass dance.

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Why are white people white? I don't know

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a blender ? A. 37 but you can try and prove me wrong

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What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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