what's black and can't swim?

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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whats worse than school...wait a minute?

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

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Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

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What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the little boy run away from Michael Jackson? Because he was scared

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My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What is a terrible tragedy and wears ice skates? Holocaust; The musical on ice

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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A gentleman walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get for you?" The gentleman replys that he would like a beer. After the bartender fulfils the gentleman's order, the gentleman drinks his beer and enjoys it.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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