Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? because he is dead -Eden Hogg

How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

Knock Knock. Who's there? .

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

What did the man say when he lost all his hair? Man: My life has been getting worse and worse ever since I developed cancer.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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