What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many people live in China? At least ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Why did the blond couldn't put a piece of meat into her mouth? Because she was vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the worste part about alzheimer's disease? You forgot you have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips and falls violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Lindsay Lohan

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops