Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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What's the difference between men and women? I really can't tell anymore, there's so many goddamn transvestites.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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knock, knock! who's there? i don't know i don't know who niether do i...

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Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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