Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? Doug I'm sorry Doug, I cannot answer the door, as I am a parrot well trained in English. But am locked in a cage.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Women's sports

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the mean have to clean up the mass amount of dead bodies? Because he lost a game of rock-paper-scissors.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

knock knock

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Six million.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Small breasts.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops