Knock knock.. Whos there? To... To who? To whom.

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-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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what do you call a gay bird a gaybird

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ur mother

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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How do you get a black man out of his house? you ring the doorbell.

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whats the diffrence between madeline macan and a submarine? there isnt one there both at the bottom of the sea and full of seaman

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Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a big fat bully!

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What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

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Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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What do you call a purple chicken eating a bicycle? A purple chicken eating a bicycle

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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Q:If pigs ever played basketball, then what sound would they make? A:Oink-oink

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he wasn't happy!

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Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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