"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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Rebecca Black.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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whats the difference between a mexican and an elevator? An elevator can raise a child.

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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how makes licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? depends on how determined you are to find out

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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