Just found out that it doesn't work.

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I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

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What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

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Why some people don't get the flu twice? Because they died!

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What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing you mum having ***

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

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Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.

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Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

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Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

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What did the black guy do to his neighbor's car while he was away? Wash it for a for as a favor.

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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