q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's dad? Neither did she

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Why doesn't Santa deliver gifts anymore? Because Santa died of a heart attack.

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How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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A man walked into a bar. It was very crowded so he decided to leave.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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well now

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xavier stop

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

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What killed the name cool? Coolio

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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68

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Scout? The Scout gets to come home from camp.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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ruddell and dodds anal

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What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig? A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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