The WNBA

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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What's black and hangs from a tree in my yard? A tire, and it also happens to be a swing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like cows, Cows are cool

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A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Obviously way more than is considered acceptable or safe, considering his recent public outbursts and problems with addiction.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. Come out with your hands up!

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter what you call him. He won't come.

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Why did the groom have cold feet? Because he was insecure in his relationship with his soon to be wife.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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Christianity.

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Chicken

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What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

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what do you call a dog with no legs? doesnt matter what you call him, he aint coming!

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops