Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

My friend was driving me home from a party, and was quite drunk. I was relieved that we did not get into a car crash.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

How you your turn a trashcan into a semi-automatic AK-47? You don't. But ask the irishman who just said "hello" to you.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

Knock knock ... *No ones home*

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

like this joke for a free ipod nano or a dead baby ?

Yo mama so fat, that when she wore a blue swimsuit to the beach and swam, the Blue Whales started sing, "WE ARE FAAMILY...EVEN THOUGH UR BUGGER THAN ME!!!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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