"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

What did the doctor say to the man with cancer? You have cancer.

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

What did the man say when he was asked if he recently saw a mime painting a lawn chair in the middle of December? "No." , and walked away, slightly confused by the matter.

What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut? A Heart Attack.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

Why do guys love to wrestle? They like to have physical contact with other men.

An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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