Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

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why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar... Every morning, and stays until it closes... [credit gilbert gottfried]

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Who is married to Uncle Joke? Antijoke.

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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