How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

why did the chicken cross the road? he didn't make it

After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

Why do Jewish people have such big noses? The nucleotides in their DNA are strung together in a certain sequence that makes them have large noses.

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

ass.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

Q: How does a robber get into your house? A: Through a door.

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

Knock Knock. Come in.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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