Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The question just posed is unanswerable, as in order to state the reasoning for the chicken crossing the road, one would have to assume the a chicken has a concept of 'road'. As the chicken is an avant, we can safely say that it has no need of pavements/ sidewalks or roads. As a result, it cannot possibly have an incentive for doing so. Consider the following hypothetical analogy: you are walking in a forest, and you unknowingly cross another animals scent trail. You cannot possibly say WHY you walked across the scent trail, as you didn't know it was there. You can state your reasoning for walking in the first place, but not for crossing that specific scent trail. In conclusion, this question is unanswerable, due to the chicken's lack of knowledge about roads.

What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

Not really a anti joke: Superman is flying over town when he suddenly spots a completely naked Spiderwoman moaning and all sweaty while rubbing her her legs, This gets Superman really h0rny but does not want to get caught, so he flies down and bangs away so fast nobody notices a thing a thing and leaves. Spiderwoman: Hey honey whats wrong? Please come lie on top of me again! Invisible Man: AAAAAAARGH!!! IT FEELS LIKE I HAVE A DAMN BOWLING BALL UP MY ASS HOLE!!!

Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because Hitler took he's parents away.

An Irishman, Scotsman and Englishman were jumping into well because they were told whatever they shouted when they fell they landed on. I lied and they died, hehe

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

what's the difference between a box of dead babies and a corvette? I don't have a corvette in my garage!

Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

What happens when a black man spills all of his grape soda? He cleans it up and recycles the empty can

What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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