Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

What is the diffrence between a jew and a mexican One is a religous practice and the other is a racial diversity

how do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? with a blender. how do you get them back out of the bowl? with tortila chips.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

What's blue? The sky.

Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

Q.How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb A.Babies are to young to screw in lightbulbs

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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