- Anti Joke

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

I love boobs

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

What is long and black? The line at KFC

why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

What's white and hides in a tree. A refrigerator.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

What did the bartender say to the fat guy? Hi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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