Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

Why couldn't the rich dumbass get into colledge? He couldn't open the door

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

Why did the mathematician cross the road? To get his mail.

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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F? No k

fava beans

What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person who lives inside is depth.

How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

whats the difference between an orange and a bicycle? One has handlebars..the other one doesnt.

It smells like triangles in here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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