Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

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Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What do you call a black guy with no hair? Bald

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A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

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The MLS

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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