Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You sick fiend

thumb_up thumb_down +9

An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? KFC was closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

ok last night i found a pic of romney saying "if i win the election 8 million people will have no job" then Obama says hey romney now that i won the election it would be 8 million and one stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's the difference between a car and a pile of dead babies? nothing, they're both overused anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo momma's so fat, she's most likely to be at risk of high cholesterol and should probably get herself tested at her nearest health clinic.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are scarce, violets are farse, come over here and i'll stick it up ya ar#e.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Is it a sin to love math? Cos I don't. I'm radical about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

what do you call a group of people who are systematiclly ruining a once well run family football club? steve kean , the venkys, and there advisors

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops