Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

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Take off your shoes.

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

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what is the world worst joke? this one

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two solely on her hair color, proceeds to kill them with a single shot glass. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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You are gay, homo, stupid and a dick

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

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A man walked into the bar and ordered a drink, drank it then stood up and left remembering that he once had a drinking problem and had overcome it.

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

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Teen pregnancy

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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