Me - "Wanna hear something that will make me laugh?" *giggles* friend - "Sure." teehee if anyone gets it.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

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What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

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A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

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What starts with a P and ends with a O-R-N? Popcorn

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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