What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. My thumb is red because I accidentally put it in the toaster.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

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Your mom is so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops