Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the mexican ugly? -UR MOM!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the pregnant teenager get for her birthday? An abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The bartender says ok, then hands him a pistol, then the man shoots the bartender and kills him.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do so many Koreans go to medical school? Practicing medicine is a rewarding and respected career.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is white and square? A ping pong block

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops