Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Hey, come here often? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

thumb_up thumb_down +10

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

thumb_up thumb_down -4

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Want to hear an urban legend? There's a straight feminist.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops