do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A man walks into a bar. On impact, he suffers quite the blow to his head, resulting in him falling unconscious. He is escorted to the hospital, where he is pronounced in a coma on arrival. His family is left devastated. His wife, who was a stay-at-home mother to their 2 children doesn't take this news very well and is sent into a spiraling depression. 16 years later, the man finally wakes from his coma to find that his son and daughter that he had left behind where now grown teenagers and almost done with high school, his wife's has remarried and given birth to his half-child. This is why you don't text while walking down a sidewalk.

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Why did Bob fall over? He was impaled by a narwhal. -BG

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What's the difference between a murdered baby and a dead baby? Not much

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penis that is all

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Why was ticklish Tom not ticklish anymore? A: he got hit by a train

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Whats the similarity between your mom and me We are both men except for your mom

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why did radio not get the song? beacause he radio didnt work.

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Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

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I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

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Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

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What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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