Why? Why Not?

Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

roses are red, violets are blue.

I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mum, I've just raped her

Penis chickens

What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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